Novel Update #03

"Visualise and execute," Zarya, from the video game Overwatch, would say in her thick Russian accent.

I did today what I said I would last night. I finished the final touches on Chapter Six, read Chapter Seven in its entirety, and have begun rewriting the latter.  At the rate that I'm going, I see myself finishing my manuscript in the foreseeable future. Once the weekend comes around tomorrow, I'll have a lot more time to continue writing. One word after the other. That is the only way this manuscript is going to be done, even if I have to go through my unproductive process of writing an act before revising the whole manuscript. I'll get there. I'll get to the top of that mountain.

It's odd. I have sacrificed a significant sum of things to commit to the schedule that I currently live through. I've stopped writing poems. By that decision, I've also stopped performing. Gone were the days I would turn off my brain and play video games with my friends on Discord. None of that. I spend most of my time alone and I'm content with the routine I've carved for myself. As such, there's a quote from Ernest Hemingway that becomes more and more relevant to me as time marches on.

"Writing, at its best, is a lonely life. Organizations for writers palliate the writer’s loneliness but I doubt if they improve his writing. He grows in public stature as he sheds his loneliness and often his work deteriorates. For he does his work alone and if he is a good enough writer he must face eternity, or the lack of it, each day." - Ernest Hemingway's Banquet Speech as read by John M. Cabot, the United States Ambassador to Sweden. 10 December 1954.

It's overly dramatic yet appropriate. There's a balance found in all things but writing is personally an exception to the rule. I've tried writing in the company of others and it doesn't pan out well, let me tell you. Perhaps it can be attributed to self-esteem that I'm uncomfortable whenever I see myself unsatisfied with my work. It stresses me and thus, being with friends or other writers, sadly, has only made me want to distract myself with their presence more so than it does push me to confront said stress.

You can argue that I take myself too seriously; you can also argue that I'm just too reluctant to open myself to new approaches. You wouldn't be wrong. I won't make excuses for myself. However, I believe that's the beauty of writing. Every writer is a different ship with controls unique to each as we all meander through the journey of having our story told.